Welcome to the post-Halloween edition of Straight Shots, No Chaser.

We have a downright spooky rehash this week that won’t include a single Halloween themed reference besides that one-time use of spooky.

I will sheepishly admit that I didn’t get to watch as much pigskin as I would have liked this Saturday. I was out doing holiday things with my significant other and sometimes you need to sacrifice a Saturday of ‘ball in order to make them happy.

Either way, it’s college football playoffs week and everything that’s happened up until now will factor into the first edition of the playoff committee’s rankings that drop on Tuesday night.

That’s why I’m going to kick off this week’s edition of Straight Shots with two teams praying to stay on the committee’s mind after narrowly escaping the clutches of defeat.

But first, I just want to say Pac-12 at night – the phenomenon/hashtag that refers to crazy Pac-12 finishes going down while most of the country is asleep – should never change.

On Thursday night, Arizona State-Oregon didn’t end until nearly 2 am CST and I couldn’t think of a more appropriate reason to not sleep on a work night or a better way to commence October’s final weekend of college football.

OK, on to real things.

The Minnesota-Michigan Ending Was Ironically Heartbreaking

Minnesota (+12.5) may have been one of the easier bets of the day, as the Golden Gophers had an unprecedented emotional boost in their fight with Michigan after the abrupt retirement of head coach Jerry Kill.

Minnesota was sure to come out with the unrelenting emotional edge of Brett Favre on Monday Night Football. Anyone saw it from a mile away.

And that’s what they did. With less than 20 seconds left in the game, Minnesota had the ball on the goal line ready to upset the Wolverines. It was all shaping up to be a magical night in the Twin Cities.

So, so brutal.

This is where having Jerry Kill on the sideline would have been quite useful because the Gophers absolutely melted down during the final sequences of the game and Michigan’s defense prevailed as time expired.

I’m assuming that final timeout got a lot of use in the locker room after the game. I’m also assuming Gopher fans had a hard time sleeping Saturday night.

College Kickers Are Bad

This one went down deep into the night Saturday (hashtag Pac-12 at night), so you probably missed it while you were wasted at a Halloween party trying to take home some girl wearing a Hawks jersey and calling it a costume.

That missed kick from Washington State kicker Erik Powell had so many ramifications from so many different angles of the game it’s almost nauseating. First off, the Wazzu money line would have paid out over 3/1 if college kickers could, in fact, kick. And the over/under in Vegas closed at a manageable 60.5 points – not a bad bet for a Pac-12 at night game.

You know, if college kickers could kick.

Simple math says a Powell make puts the total at 61 and over backers cover at the horn. I’m guessing you’ll see this one on the ‘Bad Beats’ segment of SportsCenter at Night with Scott Van Pelt on Monday.

Outside of Vegas, though, the miss was huge.

The Cougars would have moved to 6-2 overall and 4-1 in the Pac-12 on the season – with Stanford at 6-2 overall/5-1 in conference. It would have easily vaulted the Cougars into the top 25, and effectively ended the Cardinal’s hopes at a college football playoff bid.

And, this is something I never I thought I’d say this season, but Washington State would have been in the driver’s seat for the Pac-12 North division and a trip to the Pac-12 championship game.

This is why we can’t have nice things. Stupid ass college kickers always fucking it up.

Never forget.

College Referees Are Worse

This is simply inexcusable. I was following the Miami-Duke game on my phone while watching the Notre Dame-Temple tilt and saw Duke take the lead with virtually no time left on the clock. I had no money on the game so I didn’t give a shit enough to check back.

It wasn’t until like two hours later that I saw that Miami hit a walk off. Kinda.

My jaw didn’t drop because of how bananas that play was. It dropped because of how fucking idiotic and incompetent the refereeing crew was.

How on God’s green Earth do you not correctly call this after watching it for FIFTEEN MINUTES on replay?

It’s crystal clear that his knee is down on the fourth lateral and that isn’t even accounting for the three blocks in the back that happen before it.

This crew has been suspended by the ACC, rightfully so. But this one is going to have the shit stain matched only by Taco Bell on a 100-degree day so long as they reward Miami with this win.

JT Barrett Is The Epitome Of Stupid

Can you say jackass?

It’s hard to explain the stupidity of driving drunk. It’s downright impossible to fathom doing so on a college campus while you’re underage and a student-athlete at THE Ohio State University.

Let’s not forget that Barrett lost his starting job at the start of the season to Cardale Jones, only to win it back less than two weeks ago because he was playing better.

Hell of a way to show gratitude for getting your job back.

But that leads me to my next point, and in my opinion, the overarching theme of the whole situation.

Urban Meyer Is The Definition Of Spineless

Like I said, I didn’t have the luxury of watching as many games as usual this week, but the few things that stood out to me really stood out. None more than Urban Meyer, Ohio State, and how the JT Barrett situation is being handled.

Urban Meyer is a spineless prick. He has no balls to stand up for what’s right. I don’t think this even requires balls as much as it requires some fucking common sense, but coming from Urban Meyer it doesn’t lack surprise.

Clay Travis of Fox Sports 1 had this to say.

Clay Travis is the shit. You may hate him. I love him. And what he had to say about Urban Meyer couldn’t have been more true.

Because if it helps Urban Meyer win football games he’s going to do it. Like Travis said, that’s what makes The Urban Legend a great coach. And suspending the starting quarterback of the No. 1 team in the nation for one game at home against the 4-4 and head-coach-less Minnesota Golden Gophers allows Meyer to do that while making it look like he’s actually being a disciplinarian.

All I can do here is mirror Clay Travis in my belief that Meyer wants to win, but it doesn’t change the fact that he’s a spineless, gutless, and nutless bastard.