Someone hit up HR because I’m about to start writing about balls.

Nope, not those kind of balls. Well, kinda those kind of balls. What I am writing about is the greatest children’s book in the history of children’s books.

I could continue explaining the premise of the book but you probably have a pretty good idea already. That, and reading it first-hand is so much funnier. Take a look:

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I did a little back search on this masterpiece and came across the publisher’s website, Bum Bum Books, LLC. They describe “Do You Want to Play With My Balls?” as such.

“Do You Want To Play With My Balls? is a slightly inappropriate but hilarious book made for reading aloud, and laughing out loud.”

Firstly, yes. There’s a real website for this because this is a real book. Real people with real educations actually made this.

Secondly, slightly? Are you serious? This is the most crude (obnoxiously funny) book I’ve read in a long time. The scribes of this work of art should receive a damn Pulitzer as far as I’m concerned because these balls puns are endless.

If you want to purchase it for yourself, and I don’t know why you wouldn’t, you can get it from Amazon for a ripe $14.95 — or as I like to call it, chump change.

I myself have a 10-year-old brother with a birthday coming up soon and was thinking about what to get him for it. Looks like the decision just made itself. That, or I can wait until the sequel comes out soon, it’s titled…

Do You Want to Play With My Balls?