You know those crazy troll-comments on YouTube videos that are like, “I’m gonna find you and beat the shit out of you!” that are all just really empty temper tantrums used for dramatic effect?

Welp, that’s basically what North Korea did. Except instead of standing up to the bullies, America rolled over on its back like a dog playing dead.

The new Seth Rogen/James Franco movie The Interview – where the bromantic duo set out to assassinate everyone’s favorite leader, North Korea’s Kim Jong-un – was supposed to be released Christmas day as a wholesome family film parents could bring their kids to (not really).

But North Korea wasn’t really feeling it. Long story short, Kim Jong-un threw a fit, North Korea (confirmed by U.S officials) hacked Sony’s email while also sending some grammatically incorrect threats condemning the release of The Interview, and after some of the biggest theatre chains pulled the movie from their lineup, Sony said “fuck it” and halted the movie’s release entirely.

But this whole thing is far from over. And when Sony’s pride is away, the “fuck you’s” and trolls will play. Right now, posters for The Interview (see the image above) aren’t going for the still relatively hefty poster price of $15. No no, they’re going for $550 – essentially the same price we all thought now-worthless Beanie Babies from the 90’s would be in 2014.

A movie poster expert Rudy Franchi (yeah, that’s a real job) said that they’ll probably just go back to regular value after a year, but the fact that they’re going for that much now? Kind of a big deal.


Burn, baby, burn (Columbia Pictures)

In addition to the surge in poster prices, yesterday Kim Jong-un’s death scene from the movie was released. And watching it in the midst of this whole debacle is about as therapeutic as beating up a punching bag with Kim Jong-un’s face on it (patent that shit right now).

To be real for just a moment, our folding in this situation to what “might happen” is beyond pathetic. Sure, the movie was a questionable idea in the first place, but the fact is – it was made. It was going to be released as a piece of political satire and art protected under what is literally rule number one of this country: freedom of speech.

By blatantly ignoring that rule to appease a crazed totalitarian dictator is, in itself, totalitarianism-esque. Rob Lowe even went as far as comparing it to caving to the Nazis in WWII. Yikes. America folding to threats just a day after Sydney, Australia stood up to terrorism with strength and solidarity is just eye-roll worthy. Like seriously, do we need censor Netflix now too?

Not to mention, we got totally cheated out of a new Rogen-Franco flick.

But again, this thing is far from over. Let’s all cross our fingers that Rogen and Franco release the rest of the movie online for free. Let the country-wide screening of the movie and largest-ever collective “fuck you!” commence. I mean, c’mon – even Mitt Romney is saying Sony should grow a pair and release the movie online.

And when everyone – regardless of political alignment – can honestly say, “Mitt Romney is the MAN!” without any irony, you know shit’s crazy.

               (Featured photo courtesy of