And now, the Twelve Days of Christmas…for a hockey player

On the first day of Christmas someone gave to me, a brand new pair of skates by the tree.

On the second day of Christmas someone gave to me, two split lips and a brand new pair of skates by the tree.

On the third day of Christmas someone gave to me, three fractured fingers, two split lips and a brand new pair of skates by the tree.

On the fourth day of Christmas someone gave to me, four officials whistling, three fractured fingers, two split lips and a brand new pair of skates by the tree.

On the fifth day of Christmas someone gave to me, a five-minute major, four officials whistling, three fractured fingers, two split lips and a brand new pair of skates by the tree.

On the sixth day of Christmas someone gave to me, six nasty elbows, a five-minute major, four officials whistling, three fractured fingers, two split lips and a brand new pair of skates by the tree.

On the seventh day of Christmas someone gave to me, seven broken teeth, six nasty elbows, a five-minute major, four officials whistling, three fractured fingers, two split lips and a brand new pair of skates by the tree.

On the eighth day of Christmas someone gave to me, eight ugly bruises, seven broken teeth, six nasty elbows, a five-minute major, four officials whistling, three fractured fingers, two split lips and a brand new pair of skates by the tree.

On the ninth day of Christmas someone gave to me, nine vicious checks, eight ugly bruises, seven broken teeth, six nasty elbows, a five-minute major, four officials whistling, three fractured fingers, two split lips and a brand new pair of skates by the tree.

On the tenth day of Christmas someone gave to me, a ten-minute major, nine vicious checks, eight ugly bruises, seven broken teeth, six nasty elbows, a five-minute major, four officials whistling, three fractured fingers, two split lips and a brand new pair of skates by the tree.

On the eleventh day of Christmas someone gave to me, eleven painful stitches, a ten-minute major, nine vicious checks, eight ugly bruises, seven broken teeth, six nasty elbows, a five-minute major, four officials whistling, three fractured fingers, two split lips and a brand new pair of skates by the tree.

On the twelfth day of Christmas someone gave to me, twelve soothing ice packs, eleven painful stitches, a ten-minute major, nine vicious checks, eight ugly bruises, seven broken teeth, six nasty elbows, a five-minute major, four officials whistling, three fractured fingers, two split lips and a brand new pair of skates by the tree.

(Featured image components courtesy of LLBean and wikipediacommons)