At THESIXTHIRTY.com, we’re all about two things: good times and transparent advertising.
Okay, we’re about a lot of other things. You know – things like college football, Lollapalooza, and anything that’s deep-fried in butter. But for the sake of this article, we’re about those first two things.
Good times and transparent advertising.
Upon viewing this Bacardi commercial, I began to consider both of these things. I also began to consider the difference between imaginative marketing and unrealistic messaging.
Anywho, the commercial begins with a few friends sitting poolside at a surreal vacation home on top of (what appears to be) a mountain. While I can’t imagine this setting “resonates” with 99.9% of the American population, it’s certainly a captivating visual.
Still, for the questionably attractive actors in this commercial, a bottle of rum and a multi-million dollar mansion isn’t enough to get the party started. In order to have a good time, you need to invite a school bus of bonafide tens and every Calvin Klein model you can find.
Bacardi commercial – “Turn Up The Summer”
Since we’ve never been to a pool party that resembles the video above whatsoever, we’ve decided to break this down for you. According to Bacardi Limón, here is how to have a good time this summer.
In advance, we apologize for making everything you’ve done this summer completely pathetic.
Bacardi Limón’s guide to having fun this summer:
- Your parents own a $3-million home on a fucking mountain, but that’s just not going to cut it. I mean, come on, would you look at that piss-poor landscaping job?
How are you supposed to ‘turn up the summer’ when the sod around the brand-new patio isn’t finished?
- No ‘dad bods’ allowed. In fact, if you don’t look like a character from One Tree Hill, you probably won’t be allowed through the first security gate.
- There’s only one stoned hippie allowed at each party. He must have long-flowing blonde hair, and he must do belly flops the entire time.
- Females must be dancing and/or waving their hands in the air at all times.
- You must raise your glass and cheer repeatedly, even though this is the 17th time somebody has made a toast for no apparent reason.
- And remember, drink responsibly.
(Photos courtesy of iSpotTV.com)